Vulture Bait'd

Sooooo, i cacked out on the 25k. My shoulders and back have been killing me as of late; my coworkers can attest to my out-of-nowhere back spasms that had me splayed in various positions across their desks all day yesterday.
I had paid for this event though, and I had been given the day off work. So i did the next logical thing. I drove the 2.5 hours to the event ( just outside of London...), stripped down to my longsleeve race shirt and short-shorts, and then jaunted to the lodge where i asked to switch to the 10k race.
The organizers swapped my chip, and I happily lined up with the other 10k'ers at 9:15 to run. I'm thinking this was rather fortuitious, since i had been held up in traffic on the 401 where there had been some ridiculous accident, and all east-bound traffic was at a stand-still for about 10 minutes. Due to the wreck, I was running late (no pun intended) and would have likely had a very 'uncomfortable' start to the 25k, bad back or not (this is where those who know me make a face and say "Too much information, Ash").
Regardless, the race started with that loud electronic beep which makes all athletes suddenly want to lurch forward, and lurch we did...
Most technical course I've ever run - i don't know if the 25k loop was this intense but DAMN, i nearly ate dirt three or four times. I went down once, but caught myself and kept my pacer in my sights for most of the race. I DID manage to pass him and hold him off for about 3.5k, but he caught me in the last little bit, and then said "There's one more little rise coming up...." and we gunned it through, the 5 year-old in me holding back a giggle as we punched it to the finish. I crossed the line and then one of the volunteers asked if i could put my "leg up on the picnic table and get your chip off?"
"No, i don't think I can.... i'll grab it myself in a second."
The rest of the volunteers laughed and i managed to squat down and rip it off to toss in the sportstats.com bin to be tabulated later. I think my time was 51:22, since Eric finished at 51:20.
Funny anecdote... once I had crossed the line and had my chip taken off, I heard an older man congratulate me, and then i realized it was the 'guy in red' who I was using as a pacer. We hugged - which now, in retrospect sort of seems strange, but at the time it seemed only natural - and then we did the cursory introductions. Upon hearing him say "I'm Eric.", i suddenly realized that this was the same guy who I chatted with at Sulpher Springs earlier in the year. We laughed and realized that we were getting off the IR rather well. After a bit more chatter and some applause as other racers started crossing the line, we headed into the pavillion for COFFEE (this is why this is now my favourite race ever. They had COFFEE at the fueling station). The awards were handed out, and I had to laugh at the trophy I was handed as it was a gold-coloured Vulture/Turkey-ish bird, giving the thumbs up. I said goodbyes and thank-yous, then jogged to my car, where I promptly called mother with a race result update.
As i headed onto the hiway, I realized that traffic was still a mess, so I had to detour through about half a dozen Blink-And-You'll-Miss-It towns.
Finally made it to the gym at 1:15ish, where I cycled for 45 minutes to losen my legs up and watch some TLC on the new LCD screens.

Again, this was another one of those races where I felt that if i had suddenly got a flat tire, or someone said "No, you need to work at 7am", I would have nodded and given up the chance to run. It's mornings like today when i really question WHY i do it. What was the mental struggle i had this morning, compared to the past 2 races that I did (Nissan 10 mile and the Scotiabank 1/2 marathon). Was it just that it was so dark? So much colder now? Because i haven't stopped tending to a zillion other things that needed to be done since October began 13 days ago?
I wish i knew. I wish there was something that I could do that would negate this feeling of "Ugh, i just want to sleeeeep" when i get up to race. And it's only race days where i have this moment of second-thoughtedness. I can get up at 5am and run my 6 mile (or 10, depending on how fast I move in the mornings...) loop before I start work at 7. Maybe it's just the pressure... I HAVE to perform on these days. There is no stopping to tie a shoe, or adjust my bra. There is no potty-break possibility at the nearest Tim Hortons (which has now, unfortunately, become the one at Kingston and Lawrence...). This is just balls to the walls ( or perhaps ass to the grass?) running where type A personalities converge and try to run each other over. Yes, there is a large degree of comraderie. And we all laugh and joke about things later. But on the course, it's personal. Perhaps I'm not as competitive as I thought... or maybe it's just that I don't like having the option of other people beating me. I know there are many, MANY other runners that are in my same age group that could have kicked my ass on that course. They just weren't there... leaving that 1st place finish open for the taking... so I took it.
Ok... i'm starting to get into running politics, and right now, the P word is making my stomach turn. I think i'll just call it it a night now, so i can get up and run in 8 hours.
Just me and some Toots and the Maytals.

... they seem like they would be very laid-back runners.